Unreal Rib Snaps & Neck Cracks *ASMR Relax W/ Chiropractic Relief & Manual Therapy Techniques.

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It’s 10:37 and I have a slice of ASMR heaven

for you

As per u...sual, the irrefutable and beautiful sounds that are suitable

for audio-visual stimulatory glory in the Yubtub inventory

But first, can we take a moment to acknowledge that today's description prescription is brought to you by a new yoga mat

Oh.

My my.

I see her over there leaning against the wall, all rolled up and playing coy

When I know she wants my attention

Well too bad!

Bc there is a space-time continuum portal opening beneath my feet and it has already sucked down my socks

Guess I’ll have to dive in after them

Immediately

I can hear my heart beating like a jungle drum

A very soft rain pitter patter bounces along the overhead leaf canopy

There are a few hundred frogs croak-a-doaking within ear's range

I pick one up and lick it

Mmm. That one must be empty

I try another

Uuuuuuuuuuuuuu much better

Now it’s unnecessary to do anything at all

The trees all grow legs and gently waltz past me like it’s a black tie cotillion

The clouds have decided to descend beneath all branches and drench our frog bath in a fog wrath

Beaming light particles spend time dancing with dust specs, illuminating my bubble like a snow globe

A black panther’s tail is writhing in circles next to a nervous aardvark

Ah. And yes, of course. A red cap with white dots is growing taller and thicker by the moment. It grows until it has reached the status of… gigantic

A flock of gulls

C’s and E’s

Descend upon the conscious fruit for a snack

Immediately they become dragons and fly off to do battle with unjust knights of a different realm

Hilltops, mountainsides, steep ledges with sharp edges, and continental drifters are all saddened by the violence

Unseen, but felt

I drink an entire ocean of tears

A stream of memories pours from my eyes and it feels like barbed wire soaked in gasoline

But that’s medicine

A group of brown baboons laugh at my jokes

There are 29 letters in this sentence

And if you’re holding on to any shame then I advise you to cut off the s at the beginning and the e at the end… then it would be delicious

And you’d be cured

ya see…. here in the jungle, there are only 2 rules

Before I digress, please count to 1000 while sipping butterfly milk from this hollow goat horn

And then drape yourself in a stripped owl peppermint leaf pod

I’ll attach vines to my feet and hands. Make me dance on top of the gingerbread condominium

A team of fireflies and ladyboy bugs will be marching through soon to decorate the jungle floor with their bioluminescence

Don’t step on them

Keep counting

Keep sipping

And while we are lifted from the dirt and out of the fog by our own breath

We reach the canopy top and rule number one is revealed

Like a revelation

T. H. A. N. K. Y. O. U.

This heavenly announcement navigates karma yielding organic unity

And gratitude peace flowers slowly unfurl from the trees, wrapping our entire bodies and slithering into our souls through the nostril, tickling gods and goddesses hidden within the arteries of our flesh

Rule number two is the unavoidable manifestation of these events, matriculated into the pinnacle experiences of that which were both intentional and sub-directional

S. U. R. R. E. N. D. E. R.

Serenity underneath regular renderings endure necessity diversions energetically released

Not “give up”

No no

But accept and cycle back in with more gratitude peace flowers.

We don’t have to do anything

It will. Absolutely. Just. Happen.

Sacred and savage

Sophisticatedly ragged

Ironic

Ionic

Macro and fractal cosmic

And if you’re still reading

I feel you

So here’s all the gratitude I have

In an ASMR chiro salve

Medicine for the mind

And down here with the linguistic rhetoric kind

For anyone who landed at the bottom of a chiropractic ASMR PD.

In the jungle on a vroom shroom in a bubble wrapped in plants dancing with chance amongst rare and ferocious beasts

Breathing

With me to the tone of "Unreal Rib Snaps & Neck Cracks *ASMR Relax W/ Chiropractic Relief & Manual Therapy Techniques."